Answered Prayer

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         On November fourth I wrote a letter to God. This is what I wrote: "I don't want to compromise. I want every part of my life wholeheartedly devoted to you, Jesus. I don't want to be lukewarm in my life with you in any area. I want to be sensitive in my spirit and have a contrite heart. I want to be a genuinely repentant person and also be genuinely changed. I do not want to cower away from purification and conviction. I want to see my flaws as they are, repent, forgive myself, and be changed. Lord, let me be a person who when I read your word, I make it a part of who I am by the power of your spirit." The very next day I would become a foster mom and a little love would steal my heart instantly. I wish I could say I have whole heartedly trusted Jesus through this, I wish I could say I haven't lived in fear. I wish I could say I didn't let my emotions get the best of me. I wish I could say a lot of things that I simply cannot. I can say, though, that God held up my prayer even when I didn't have the strength to pray it anymore. He has not let me cower from purification and He has gently shown me areas that need His help to change. He has been the strength of my heart, my comforter, counselor, and friend. He has helped me just like He promised that He would.
            I have seen both my strengths and weaknesses come out boldly. My strength to love, had moments of holding too tightly. My strength of hope, gave way to fears and vain imaginings, but God's grace has been ENOUGH. I am thankful he is truer to me than I am to myself. He listens to my prayers and answers, even when the answer is harder than I wanted it to be.
                      

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